i don't have mono, and all my other tests came back negative/normal, so i guess that's a good thing.  however, i am on some antibiotics that are more powerful than penicillan, so my dr. said it should wipe out whatever's wrong with me.  however, i know that there's something going on in my body that's not right, i can tell, so i've convinced myself in my paranoid state that i have lukemia.  i love my life.

moving on.  slightly bitter that everyone else seems to be done with work as of tomorrow, when i should have been joining them in the ranks.  but no, sophie has to fly off to toronto next week leaving me to take care of her mom and siblings.  i'm really not bitter in the least........stupid skank.  but i only have four and a half days left.  yay me.

so now that both the kids are at camp at the same time for a bit this week, i've fallen back into my days from high school when i would watch days of our lives. yes, it's true, i was once a soap opera junkie.  anyway, my mom hated that i watched them, so i basically could only do it when she wasn't around.  she always said how they're stupid and lame, and nothing ever changes so that if you've missed out for x number of episodes, you'd still be able to pick right up where you left off.  five years later, turns out she's right.  haven't seen the show in many many years, and i still know exactly what's going on.  gotta love it.  ok, i have to go eat food and get ready for my one oclock date w/ days:) tootles.

i've decided that i'm paranoid.  after watching everything that linda has gone through in battling her cancer, i've convinced myself that i'm going to get some sort of cancer and i don't know whether i'll really want to deal with all the treatments or if i'll say "aw fuck it and let me die."  not the most uplifting tthing to be thinking about, but what can ya do?  i'm also convinced that i'm going to get in a car accident.  in my mind, there are these phantom cars that are just going to come out of no where and either rear end me, side swipe me, or hit me head on.  i need help.

second thought: girls have to spend so much more money on upkeep than boys.   it's not fair.  between makeup, bras, tampons, birth control devices other than condoms, hair accessories, and purses among other things, it's unfair how much more money we spend.  guys should have to give birth, that could be teh trade off.

so friday was my half day mark of being done w/ the summer b/c i decided i was going to take off the last week to have some recouperation time before school starts.  very excited to think i only have 25 more days of child care.  went over to pat's with kel and taryn last night which was bunches of good times.  the boys were calling dibs on taryn, and a fight almost broke out over her, so kelly and i jokingly decided that she can never come out with us next year because she'll hog all the attention.  but then we justified the fact that we won't get the attention because we have boyfriends.  it'll be quite the ego killer next year with taryn around .  despite the resolution i made a few months ago that pat and i can't be drunk around eachother b/c it never ends up well, we got drunk together and got in a stupid fight over i dont even remember, and consequently ended up breaking up.  it was a rough 20 minutes or so, i was actually more pissed off than anything, but then we worked things out and we're ok again.  stupid drunken drama.  but aside from that it was a fun night and i had a good time with kel and taryn.

ok, i'm off to chop off my hair and then watch the wee ones all night.  tootles.

so i've come to the conclusion that i'm really not in a posting mood any more.  it seems like more of a hassle than an enjoyable event.  it's amazing how things change if you're not using blogging as a means of procrastination.  maybe i'll be back to my normal ways once school starts.

first off, people are stupid and cruel beyond words.  what's with the attack in london?  i really can't fathom what goes through anyone's mind when they orchestrate any type of plan that is intended to wipe out a bunch of innocent people.  i cant even imagine what it would have been like to be going to work just as you do every other day and then end up injured or dead b/c some sicko decided to blow up the tube.  but i guess the same could be said for any terrorist attack.  prayers and thoughts out to those affected by the attacks. 

second, i'm going through a total nostalgia phase again for sas.  yesterday i got an email that the captain from my voyage died unexpectly on monday during the summer voyage.  made for a slightly depressing reading.  and then it was bridget's bday took, and she wanted sushi, so we all went out to a sushi restaurant.  totally reminded me of when we went out to japan.  then today i felt the need to watch my dvd from the voyage, so i did just that.  i can't believe it's been almost a year since i left for vancouver and the subsequent voyage, and i can't believe it's been so long.  it still feels like it just happened yesterday.  anyway, done being nostalgic for the time being.

thought:  aren't friends amazing?  i mean, just think of the dynamics b/w friends and what they really are.  they are just people that you can talk to for hours about stupid, mindless, idiotic things, and never feel like you wasted any time.  they're there for you when you need them, but also to share laughter and joy.  it's amazing how friendships can develop and how they form from nothing.  makes me wonder where/what that jumping off point is where a stranger becomes a friend. 

i think i need to have my tubes tied.  yup, that's my verdict.  today was the day from hell with sibling rivalry and when we went grocery shopping and the cashier asked what we were doing today and i responded going swimming, he made a comment about drowning them.......oh if only.  but not really, cuz i do actually love the brats, i just sometimes need to not be near them.  but anyway, my mom convinced me that i really do need some time off and it probably wont' be healthy for me to go the whole summer straight through, move up, and start school two days after my last day of nannyng.  thus, i decided to bail out two days earlier.  i'm a rebel, i know.  but my last day of dog sitting was today, so hopefully things will calm down a bit.  i start again on the 21st for ten days, but it's money and i love dogs, so i should be ok.

i think tha'ts it for now.  i was supposed to go up to boulder for cody's bday, but i'm just toooo tired.  i think i need to crash here in the next not too long. fun day of nannying and then bowling w/ kel and taryn and maybe pat tomorrow night.  okily, i'm out.  ciaosers.